Why

For the past two years, I've done this crazy thing called NaNoWriMo (pronunciations vary. Pronounce it like the first syllables of the words "National Novel Writing Month," which is what it stands for, and you've probably got it). As the name implies, it involves writing a novel. In a month. That month happens to be November, which will be starting on Thursday.

I've managed to complete the 50,000 word goal both of the past two years, and while I'm going to participate this year, winning (the NaNo term for reaching that goal) may not be an option. College is busy, and I don't want to lose sleep and sanity over this. So if it gets to be too much, I'll have to stop. Some things, like research projects, final papers, and sanity are in fact more important than a first-draft novel. It might not be easy – my mentality in the past has been "if I do NaNo, I have to win" – but I think this month will be good for me. I need to train that perfectionist in me to show up at the appropriate times, and I need to convince myself that this isn't one of them.

Because of the thirty day deadline, NaNo novels aren't usually good. In fact, they're usually pretty bad. It's a quantity-over-quality kind of situation. This is why when people ask if they can read it, I'm a little hesitant. As a mostly nonfiction writer, NaNo is my biggest foray into the world of fiction, so most of my fiction is pretty bad. I'm more willing to share some of my nonfiction poetry and prose than I am to share my fiction.

Usually, when I tell people I'm going to write a novel in a month, they say one of two things: either "You're crazy!" or "Why?" I already know I'm crazy, so I'm going to tackle the second question for a minute.

Why write a novel? Why write a draft that I already know isn't going to be good? Why spend so much time with something like that? Or, for that matter, why write at all?

In response, here are just a few of the things I've learned through NaNo and through being a writer:

First, I write because I must. For me, writing is a way that I express myself, and this world would be a pretty dull place if none of us expressed ourselves. We were created to be uniquely us, and bottling that up inside don't often do us much good.

Second, I write because I learn. I've already mentioned that writing, especially this month, teaches me to put my perfectionism away and just go. It teaches me to turn toward my inner editor that says, "No, this will never be good enough. You'll never be good enough," and say in response, "Yup, I know. And that's why I'm doing it anyway."

Third, I write because I love. NaNo is a unique experience of writing in community. There's something bonding about sitting alongside other people who are also furiously churning out (or furiously trying to churn out) words into that first draft. We bounce ideas off each other. We challenge each other to keep going.

Finally, I write because I am. My writing, and yes, even my bad writing, is a little glimpse into who I am. By writing, I can show the way the world is and the way the world could be. Even if it's a silly little story set in a generic fairytale universe, I have a story that wants to be told. I write because in my writing, I can bring shalom. I can bring glory to God.

If you want to follow along with my progress this November, take a look at the graph over here once the month gets underway. My blogging will probably be a bit less frequent, but I'll try to put up a thing or two. It might be all NaNo-related. It might not. I don't know.

But whatever the case, I'll be writing.